Martha, I felt deep every single word you have written here. You know there is one good thing about depression, it makes you stronger each time. It makes you self sufficient even when you are breaking inside. The difficult thing in life is to "fake it" but depression makes it too easy.

My friend, you are stronger than you know. Please be well and keep smiling not for anyone but for yourself. You deserve everything beautiful. :)

Sending you healthy and positive vibes. 😊